Are You a Cheerleader or a Life Success Coach?
If you would have asked me if I was my kids’ cheerleader, I would have said, without much hesitation, “OF COURSE I WAS!” And I would have been right, because I had done my best to be their greatest advocate, to boost their self-esteem, and to help them have a good day-or moment. But the truth was, I had NOT always set them up for life success.
I often gave them “high fives” for a job half done. I gave passes for assigned tasks that were not finished but they whined enough that I couldn’t stand it anymore. I was creating cheating and conniving people that figured out that there were ways to get out of almost anything. Your sweet young darlings can quickly perfect this type of behavior. And when you realize that you’ve been “had”, you feel like YOUR PARENT IQ has tanked.
It’s times like this, when your mom-ego is bruised, that you can have some moments of clarity, and yes- true revelation! I had just such a moment that led me on a really great journey to becoming more than a cheerleader. I became an intentional life success coach for my kids.
This new direction I took came from books I had read, talks I had heard, and watching other really great parents at work. Oh yes-and throw in many desperate mom prayers along the way! I came up with a system that 1) determined what values were most important to my husband and me that we wanted to instill in our kids, 2) figured out what things motivated or de-motivated each of our kids, and 3) made up a list of incentives that would be so desired that they would move mountains to get them.
We called our plan the All Done Day plan. When we rolled it out, it was in a very rough, raw form, and we were less than confident that it would change anything in our home. But imagine our shock when kids started to perform beyond our expectations!
Each child had their daily plan posted on their door or wall, and had received a clear explanation of what was expected of them. There were some household chores on the list. There were some daily habit building tasks that encouraged learning or physical fitness. Sometimes there were challenges to get them to push harder into something they needed to grow in. Right beside each child’s list, was a number of highly investigated Incentives that they could save up their earned All Done Day coupons to buy.
My husband and I had a code word we sometimes used (just between us in fun) to defuse a frustrating time with our kids. One of us would talk about YRK: Your Rotten Kid. Well, when we started living with the All Done Day plan, we were rarely using the YRK acronym, because we were seeing YAKs: Your Amazing Kids all around us! They were choosing to succeed and complete their All Done Day plans- and not just now and then. They were hitting the target over and over again.
Their plan became their life success coach and we, as parents, were seeing daily reasons to affirm them as they made good choices that brought rewards they had worked diligently to attain. They were being challenged to build good habits, to be better people, and training to be great grown-ups. They were learning what was needed to be a part of keeping a home clean, what it means to learn to solve their own problems, manage their time, and how to work to get something of value to them.
It is fun to listen to our four kids, who are now all adults, talk about how they appreciate the value of the All Done Day plan and how it helped equip them for life. For our youngest, when she was in college, juggling homework, a job, and mentoring freshmen in her dorm, she didn’t panic but kept herself focused as she pushed through to get things done. She didn’t have to learn this for the first time when she left home. She had been doing this through her All Done Day plan for years.
All Done Day helps you to be the cheerleader and life success coach your kids really need.
What are you waiting for?
To make this happen in your home, order All Done Day: How to Win at Everyday Parenting today.
Join me or share posts from Facebook or Instagram.
